A Desire to Help


When did we lose the desire to help?

It seems so natural to my one year old.

Give her a rag and she will wipe everything down for you.
Say “Can you put that in the trash?” and, after a few detours, we put it in the trash and clap about it.

She loves helping with the dishes.

But I think yard work is probably her favorite.

Even older kids ask “Can I help you cook?”, “Can I hold the baby?”, and “CAN I HELP?!”

Maybe we spend so much time saying “No” to the help that we are offered by them that our children learn that their help isn’t valuable or wanted.

No, I’m not going to give her a knife to chop up the veggies quite yet…

But if she gets the broom out….

Why not tell her “Thank you” like I would anyone else?

Why not begin teaching her now that hard work and helping others is a thing to be commended, not rejected?

Perhaps it’s better to reinforce that “In every job that must be done, there is an element of fun!”

(Name that movie!!!!)

My challenges for you today are this.

1. Say “Thank you!” to those who help you, even in the smallest things. It’s sometimes amazing what a few kind words can do for someone.

2. Do something to help without being asked. You may find that it is pretty rewarding…


16 responses to “A Desire to Help”

  1. Doesn’t get any better than that…thank you so much for sharing…you have no idea how deeply those photo warm an old man’s heart…give her extra kisses tonight. 🙂

    Be encouraged!

  2. I’m very surprised how few adults say Please and Thank You, basics we try to teach our children. I also realized that it was better to express gratitude for the help extended than to complain about the way in which it was performed. Kids (and partners) are more motivated to help when their efforts are appreciated and not criticized.

  3. I’m very surprised how few adults say Please and Thank You, basics we try to teach our children. I also realized that it was better to express gratitude for the help extended than to complain about the way in which it was performed. Kids (and partners) are more motivated to help when their efforts are appreciated and not criticized.

    • Good point. I had to learn, especially during school when hubby is stuck with a lot of the house chores, that it doesn’t matter if the towels get folded like I do it. The fact that they’re clean is a blessing enough!

  4. I also think the desire to help disappears because when they are older, kids are often forced to help with things they don’t want to do … If you’re made to do something “or else,” or bribed to do it with a reward, you lose the intrinsic desire to do it. And thus kids hate chores and homework where they once loved helping others and learning.

    She may not always be wanting to help … especially when you *want* her to help, lol … but I like your idea of responding gratefully to the times she DOES want to help.